023: The Missing Coordinates
So you know where I’m going now. What about this, that or the other? Why aren’t I going there?
Greece
Like I said yesterday, I’d like to go to the country historians know as Hellas and its current inhabitants call Ellada. But everywhere I’m going is near at least somewhere else I’m going. I’m flying both into and out of Turkey, so that doesn’t really count. The nearest other place on the schedule is Croatia, at least three countries away (gotta love them Balkans) and I don’t even know if I’ll be going to tie-land yet. Not to mention the fact that adopting the Euro completely stuffed Greece as a tourist destination, meaning Western Europeans started hitting North Africa and the Middle East instead. Which meant that a lot of historical and scenic tourist operations were shut down or run on reduced hours, which initiated a cycle… and that’s only a little of what the Euro’s done to Greece and the Greek economy. So, paying off Greece.
Norway
I’m a backpacker. Norway, according to most reliable measures, is the most expensive country on earth. You do the maths. So despite being an inspirational example of postmodern social progressivism and Nordic socialism (the latter done so effectively that if oil prices and government policy continue their current trends the whole country could afford to take a holiday – maybe to the Caribbean or somewhere nice like that, they must get sick of all the rain and snow) and, of course, the home of Trve Norsk Black Metal, I’ll probably be giving Norge a miss.
Russia
More culture, history and wodka than I could possibly take in, true. But it’s a bit more of a hassle than surrounding areas, there’s no easy way of getting to the interesting bits from anywhere else I’m heading, I’ve got to miss out on some things to avoid giving each country like, a week, and the police… yeah, let’s just leave it at that.
Nova Scotia
I’d like to, but there’s basically no international flights into there (and I’m not going to backtrack from Quebec) and once again, I can only fit so much into a year.
Nevada
Dude, screw Las Vegas. You know what Vegas is? It’s America’s juvenile, exceptionalist self-image given life in the form of a giant capitalist playground. Also I am poor. Also gambling is bloody stupid and should only exist in the form of a game of 500 or poker between friends over a few beers or something like that death to pokies Andrew Wilkie akbar
Florida
See above but replace “gambling” with “pointless touristy bullshit that I could do in Queensland if I was that way inclined and had the maturity of a teen-ager”
Georgia
Partly for the insane local music scenes (Athens indie and psych-pop, Georgia sludge, Dirty Souf hip-hop), partly because the only parts of the South I’m visiting are on the perhiphery and I reckon this would be about as “real south” as I could reasonably handle – I’d probably off myself if I was stuck in, say, Mississippi. But that’s the kicker – it’s nowhere near anywhere else I could stand to go, let alone want to be, so I’m giving the state of both Jimmy Carter and Andre 3000 a miss.
The Midwest
If you want to see the real America in one place, wrote Don Watson, whose American Journeys is one of the main guides for the three months I’m spending in the country, go to Chicago. He may be right – it certainly sounds convincing enough, and Watson is rarely wrong – but I’m missing it. Fact of the matter is that no matter how interesting the area is – the closest thing to a “real America” one can find in a “nation state” of at least a half dozen nations, the glorious metropolis of Chicago, the post-dream ghost city that Detroit is turning into, the Nordic immigrant-influenced Twin Cities at the heart of the North Star Republic and LF’s favourite state, Minnesota, the small towns and minutiae of history of Illinois immortalised by Sufjan Stevens in his brilliant Illinoise record – I’ve only got so much time and I’m not really going anywhere near it (are you seeing a pattern here?), except Ontario and I’d much rather avoid hassle by only crossing the US border once.
Vermont
The once (and future?) Green Mountain Republic which supplies the US Congress with easily its greatest currently serving Senator? Guy Rundle suggested in Down To The Crossroads that when the United States begins to break up as all empires inevitably must, Vermont will be the first to go. When it does, presumably under the leadership of Chairman Bernie Sanders with the support of the Sandernistas – the reborn Green Mountain Boys – I shall surely move there. It’s also just about the only state I trust with the interpretation of the Second Amendment, having the curious dichotomy of being a state of ultra-liberal gun nuts (appropriately, it also has a Republican governor, one more progressive than most Democrats). But just visiting it would do it an injustice and I’d barely pick up any of the culture that makes it the coolest state in the US.
Egypt
Much like with Greece, I feel like I’m being a poor excuse for a history nerd by paying off the Black Land. But once again, it’s not really near anywhere else I’m visiting, plus most of the cool stuff got plundered by British and French colonialists so I can see it in museums in those countries. Plus, culturally, it doesn’t really fit at all with the overarching theme of this trip, fitting in better with what I have very, very tentatively planned for the future. Which brings me to…
The Rest Of The World
The Four Tigers, of which I consider one the greatest city I’ve ever visited (Singapore)? The gulf states, where Arab culture meets stunning modernity? The paradise of nerds worldwide, ~*glorious Nippon*~? The wild card continent of colonial past and socialist future, Latin America? The home of the coolest empire in history, Mongolia (sorry all others)? And of course the great cultural melting pot and world power of the future, India?
Time will tell. Who knows what I’ll get up to in a few years’ time.
